An A+ Day for Mommy

Even as I type in the title for this entry, I cringe at how I judge myself so critically on a daily basis. Oh dear... Well, today felt good anyways - which means I didn't yell or get cross or feel bitchy or swear or... well, you can fill in the list of possible misdeeds that I didn't commit as a parent. I want to celebrate what I've done right for a change, and today there are actually things to talk about in that regard!

Exhibit A: I attended to Addie several times last night because Daddy wasn't feeling well. Addie was fine with me on the first attempt, but the second time I came into his room, I was greeted with cries of "I want my Daddy" and "Mommy go away." Instead of trying to talk him out of his feelings or getting supremely irritated at his irrational behaviour, I just sympathized. After explaining why Daddy wouldn't be coming down, I held him for a long time, making soothing sounds, rocking back and forth. About fifteen minutes later he was back asleep, and I felt like we had connected in a special way.

Exhibit B: Addie always wants to get involved in whatever is happening in the kitchen, and it often results in a mess. Rather than letting irritation and impatience get the better of me, today I encouraged his involvement and accepted the mess. I cleaned it up promptly, and it didn't get out of hand. Addie helped make bread and sushi rice, and we had a lovely time together doing it.

Exhibit C: As always, Addie protested getting his snowsuit and winter gear on this morning. Instead of fighting him, I started a silly game of tickling and teasing him. His anger turned to laughter, and he forgot to fuss. Eventually he moved into a peaceful, somewhat catatonic, prostrate position on the floor and just stared pensively at the ceiling while I dressed Bennie.

I realize that all of these examples revolve around Addie, the toddler, and I guess it's my relationship with him that feels more challenging at times. I expect more of him, and he gets the brunt of my frustration with everything because he's older. It's harder to be mad at a baby who is totally vulnerable and immobile without my assistance. Anyways, I'm not sure what accounts for my good behaviour today. Some days are easy and others are difficult, and I'm often left scratching my head as to why. But I'll accept this little bit of grace and see what tomorrow brings.